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How To Change Your Attitude When You Can’t Change Your Situation

BY DAVID ZULBERG    JANUARY 20, 2015 8:28 AM EST

Sometimes changing your physical circumstances isn’t possible — or not possible soon enough, or you may want a less drastic change, but you still want to be happier. You can’t get to a new job right away or you regularly bump into that friend who makes you feel badly, what options do you have left?

Change your perception, belief or opinion of the situation — and that will help you change your attitude.

The Greek philosopher Epictetus said it beautifully more than 2,000 years ago: “People are disturbed, not by things (that happen to them), but by the principles and opinions which they form concerning (those) things. When we are hindered, or disturbed, or grieved, let us never attribute it to others, but to ourselves; that is, to our own principles and opinions.”

Modern behavioral science agrees! American psychologist Albert Ellis, famous for developing rational emotive behavior therapy, explained that “how” people react to events is determined largely by their “view” of the events, not the events themselves.

Have no clue how to change your perception — and improve your attitude? Here are five easy ways to start:

1. Admit to yourself that you’re not happy.

You can’t change anything if you aren’t aware that something needs to be changed. Stop the cycle of wishing things were different and take control of your thoughts and reactions to events and people.

2. Realize optimism is a choice. 

You are not born with a positive or negative attitude. It is something you become through your perspective of experiences. Very few situations are completely bad. Always try to come up with three to five positives of any challenging situation and write them down so you can remember them.

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3. Use positive words.

Use statements like, “I am hopeful,” or, “We will find a resolution,” throughout the day. The words you use when you talk have a major impact on your attitude and emotional outlook.

4. Hang out with friends who have a happy vibe.

Try surrounding yourself with friends that exude positive energy. Pay attention to the words they use when they talk to you about their day. You will be amazed how simple it is to ascertain if they are a positive or negative influence.

5. Say a daily affirmation.

Find a quote that is meaningful to you and say it aloud every morning. “Something great is going to happen today,” sends your energy in an expectant and positive direction. I know it sounds a bit “Zen” and somewhat mystical, but it is actually a very simple and effective method for retraining your subconscious mind — and advocated by both ancient and scientific research.

So the next time you are faced with a challenging situation, remember these tips for molding your perception — and improving your attitude. You may not be able to change it, but you can certainly choose your mental and physical response to it. As time passes, you will notice a real shift in your attitude, and so will your friends and family!

source: www.care2.com
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Sunny Regions Reflect Lower ADHD Rates: Study

By Brenda Goodman, HealthDay News

TUESDAY, Oct. 29, 2013 (HealthDay News) — Sunny days can be a big distraction for those who are tethered to their desks, but a new study suggests that sunlight may actually lower the prevalence of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

Scientists mapped the number of ADHD diagnoses across the United States and in nine other countries. They compared those rates to the intensity of sunlight those regions receive year-round.

Regions that got the most sun had rates of ADHD diagnoses that were about half as high as regions that got the least, according to the research.

“The maps line up almost perfectly,” said study author Martijn Arns, director of Brainclinics, in the department of experimental psychology at Utrecht University in Nijmegen, Netherlands.

In the United States, the sunniest states were in the Southwest and West and included Arizona, California, Colorado, Nevada, New Mexico and Utah. Rates of ADHD diagnoses in those states ranged from 6 percent to 8 percent. In the darkest states, which included a swath of the Northeast, rates of ADHD ranged from 10 percent to 14 percent.

The relationship between ADHD and sunlight held steady even after researchers adjusted their data to control for other factors that might account for differing rates of ADHD diagnoses, such as race, poverty and the male-to-female ratio in each area.

Researchers even considered whether vitamin D, which is produced in the body after exposure to sunlight, might account for the differences, but they said a prior study ruled that out.

They also examined whether more sunlight might be tied to lower rates of other kinds of mental disorders, including depression and autism. It wasn’t.

sun

The researchers admitted that the link could just be a coincidence, and there isn’t necessarily a cause-and-effect relationship between sunny climates and lower rates of ADHD diagnosis. But since some children and adults with ADHD have disrupted body clocks, which are regulated by light, they believe the relationship deserves further investigation.

Arns said about 80 percent of adults and about one-third of children with ADHD have trouble falling asleep at night. Some studies have found that these night-owl tendencies are driven by a delayed peak in the sleep hormone melatonin.

Melatonin seems to be especially disrupted by the blue wavelengths of visible light, Arns said. Energy-saving LED light bulbs, as well as the screens of tablets, smartphones and computers emit blue light. When people use those devices in the evening, it can delay melatonin release and disrupt sleep.

But Arns said people who live in sunny climates may get some natural protection from this sleep upset because they get a healthy dose of bright light in the morning, which keeps their body clocks on track.

He’s currently exploring ways to test his theory.

An expert who was not involved in the study, which was published in the Oct. 15 issue of the journal Biological Psychiatry, said he’s not sure melatonin is the best explanation.

Children in sunny climates may spend more time playing outside, for example, said Dr. Andrew Adesman, chief of developmental and behavioral pediatrics at the Steven & Alexandra Cohen Children’s Medical Center in New Hyde Park, N.Y.

“There’s a small but growing literature talking about exercise as a way to moderate ADHD and hyperactivity,” Adesman said. “There could be other variables that are responsible.”


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 10 Inspirational Quotes To Keep You Motivated This Winter

BY KAIA ROMAN    JANUARY 19, 2015 
Sometimes I envy animals who hibernate. Curling up into a warm and cozy sleep until spring arrives, sounds appealing at times when life feels overwhelming and the winter blahs are in full effect.

When I need a little inspiration to keep going, I turn to these 10 quotes — they’re posted on my bathroom mirror, on my desk and in well-loved earmarked books.

1. “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.” -Margaret Mead

This quote was particularly powerful for me during my environmental activism days in college, but still resonates deeply as daily acts of inspiration. As one of the world’s foremost cultural anthropologists, Mead’s quote is informed from her observations. Whenever I feel small and insignificant, I read this quote and remember the power we each have to change the world.

2. “If you think you can, or if you think you can’t, either way, you’re right.” -Henry Ford

I often think about this one when I have self-defeating thoughts and it inspires me to challenge myself and change my thoughts around. So many of the hard times I experience in life are the ones I give myself, and facing a challenge having already decided that I will fail certainly doesn’t improve my chances of success.

3. “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step.” -Martin Luther King, Jr.

This is a vivid image for me, because I feel like this pretty much every day — though Dr. King was referring to much greater challenges than those I face on a daily basis. However, the rule still applies — it’s all about faith. It’s about the sureness that even if you can’t see how it will all unfold, you know the Universe has your back and everything will work out.

4. “The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire.” -Ferdinand Foch

Foch was a French military general during the First World War and when he talked about weapons, he was usually talking about the kind that explode. However, this quote remains meaningful because it inspires us to ponder what truly lights the soul on fire. I have felt it — at times when I am working on a project I’m really passionate about, when I’m immersed in my writing, when I’m in the zone with my children — I know that at those times I am truly at my most brilliant and powerful. My personal challenge is to light that fire every day.

winter

 

5. “Think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.” -Kahlil Gibran

My husband and I printed this quote on our wedding programs twelve years ago, as it really epitomizes our unlikely love story. It still brings tears to my eyes. All of the best strategic planning in the world could not have orchestrated the myriad of “coincidences” that had to take place for my husband and I to meet and fall in love. This is of course, the case with most of the wonderful things that happen in the rest of our lives, too. When we let go and let the Universe (or God, Love, etc.) work its magic, the result is far more spectacular than that which we could have created with our thoughts and actions alone.

6. “All that we are is a result of what we have thought.” -Buddha

This is really the basic tenant of Buddhism, and it is not to be taken lightly. I often take a mental inventory of my thoughts to gauge what I am currently creating in my life. How much anxiety and worry is floating around? How much internal complaining? How much gratitude and wonder? If all that we are experiencing now is a result of our past thoughts, then we are literally creating our future with our current thoughts. It takes some acceptance of responsibility and accountability, but I love feeling and knowing that I have this power.

7. “I have so much to accomplish today that I must meditate for two hours instead of one.” -Mahatma Gandhi

Honestly, I never meditate for one hour, let alone two, but the sentiment in this quote is exactly what I need on many days. When my to-do list reaches critical mass, my tendency is to feel overwhelmed and frantic and therefore make more errors, have more accidents, and generally feel miserable as I accomplish my tasks simply for the sake of checking them off the list. When I remember Gandhi’s wise words, no matter how busy I am, I sit quietly and breathe until I feel calm again. Then I can go forth and accomplish, knowing that my top priority is not how many things I get done, but how I feel while I am doing them.

8. “The path of least resistance is non-resistance.” -I Ching

It was Carl Jung who first said, “What you resist persists,” a phrase that has become popular among spiritual seekers. Jung was a student of the ancient Chinese text, the I Ching, so perhaps that’s where his thoughts on the matter originated. I too have studied the I Ching for many years, and it continually reveals new and wondrous wisdom to me. I love this pearl of wisdom in particular, because it is so simple. When I am stuck in fear or anger or any other negative emotion, simply yielding to what is and removing any resistance always has the power to shift not only how I feel on the inside, but also the circumstances on the outside.

9. “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” -Mark Twain

This wisdom and wit of this quote certainly applies to my life as I slide into my 40s and embrace aging gracefully, but I also like to think of this quote whenever anything is bothering me. All I really have to do is stop worrying — whether it’s about my age or not. Easier said than done most times, but so effective whenever I master it. I’m making this my motto for the year, and am really practicing the art of “not giving a damn.”

10. “Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know.” -Pema Chodron

When I think about the challenges that have lingered in my life and the magnitude of the lessons I’ve learned from them, I know Chodron is right. I also think about those things that have left my life in what felt like too short of a time, be it loved ones who have died or relationships I wasn’t ready to let go of — the same wisdom applies. When I view my experiences, my relationships and my challenges as teachers, I am more inclined to pay attention to the lessons they are bringing me.


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5 Ways Your Diet Affects Your Mood

While your mood sometimes dictates what foods you eat — hello ice cream – what you choose to eat can conversely affect your moods. While it may seem harmless enough, what you choose to eat for lunch could impact how you feel all afternoon. We all know about the “hangries” — being so hungry that you become cranky and angry — but once you’re fed, your meal can actually enhance or detract from your mental state. Here are 5 ways in which the foods you eat (or don’t eat) rule your moods.

Sugar levels. Most obviously, fluctuations in your blood sugar levels can have an incredible impact on mood. Low blood sugar can cause crankiness. On the other hand, a sharp spike in blood sugar can provide a sense of feel-good before sharply crashing into the pit of despair. A good idea to keep your moods stable is to maintain balanced blood sugar levels with a diet low in added sugars, combined with enough protein, fat, and fiber.

Neurotransmitters. There is a reason that chocolate is renown the world over for boosting happiness, besides the textural pleasure. It is loaded with the neurotransmitter serotonin — aka the happy chemical. Many other foods contain neurotransmitters, like dopamine and tryptophan, in varying amounts — such as spinach, turkey, seeds, and avocados. While these aren’t in very substantial quantities, eating a varied diet of good mood foods certainly can help. What’s more, certain foods, especially comfort foods, encourage the release of endorphins, another powerful group of infamous mood boosters.

Allergens and sensitivities. Unknown or unheeded food sensitivities can make you feel less than awesome. Symptoms like bloating, acne, and lethargy can shatter even the best of moods. If you have been feeling generally down in the dumps, take a look at the allergens in your diet — gluten, dairy, eggs, nuts, etc. — and consider ditching any that you consuming regularly for a two week trial period and reassess how you feel.

love-your-gut

Deficiencies. Having too little of a certain vitamin or mineral in your system can easily throw off your moods. B vitamins, omega-3 fatty acids, folate, and magnesium, among others, are important components for a balanced mind. If you are deficient, things may not be functioning the way they are meant to, which could mean a lowered mood. A good multivitamin is a great place to start, and you can tailor your diet from there. Of course, consult your doctor before embarking on any new supplementation regimens.

Psychobiotics and the gut. The brain-gut connection is indisputable. Not only do the little critters living in your digestive system have a profound affect on your weight and immune system, but they impact your mental outlook as well. They are known as psychobiotics – a subset of probiotics — simply described as bacteria found in certain foods that can help deliver mood-boosting chemicals to the brain. Studies have hinted that regular consumption of these types of probiotics can have a mood-lifting impact on your brain, which is a great reason to stock up on yummy yogurt and sauerkraut!

While exercise is also an important factor, eating a diverse diet of healthy, wholesome foods can have an incredible impact on how you feel each and every day. Be the best you can be by following a healthy, fun, well-rounded lifestyle filled with good, healthy foods.

Jordyn Cormier     January 25, 2015


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Here’s What to Eat to Lower Inflammation

by Agata Blaszczak-Boxe, Contributing Writer      January 24, 2015 

Ginger, nuts, fatty fish and whole grains are just some of the many foods that have been touted to have anti-inflammatory properties. But do they work?

It turns out that experts agree that eating a diet rich in such foods may in fact help lower the levels of inflammation in the body. But they stress that adding or increasing the consumption of any one food is likely not going to have a profound effect on one’s health.

In a new, small study, published this month in the Nutrition Journal, researchers found that men who consumed flaxseed for 42 days experienced a significant decrease in inflammatory markers compared with men who didn’t consume flaxseed. In another study, published in October 2011 in the journal Cancer Prevention Research, the authors found that taking ginger root extract appeared to reduce markers of colon inflammation. And, according to the results of a study published in August 2011 in the Journal of Biological Chemistry, curcumin (the main compound in the spice turmeric, which is used in curry) could help suppress biological mechanisms that lead to the inflammation in diseases of the tendons.

“There is abundant evidence [that foods can help lower inflammation], and it is not as if this is something we are not sure about in science,” said Kristin Kirkpatrick, a registered dietitian at the Cleveland Clinic. “I think what we are still learning is the mechanism in which it occurs.”

Rheumatoid arthritis, cardiovascular disease and diabetes are some of the conditions that have been linked with higher levels of inflammation.

However, Kirkpatrick stressed that adding just one specific food to your diet is unlikely to work wonders for lowering inflammation, or for improving health in general.

3 Things to Know About the New Mediterranean Diet Study

“If you follow a very sound diet that has plenty of produce, plenty of plant-based foods like nuts and whole grains — that really helps in general to reduce overall inflammation throughout the entire body,” Kirkpatrick told Live Science. And the reduction in inflammation that can come from a changing your diet can be very significant, but it only works if you eat such foods across the board.

Kirkpatrick also stressed that people who take dietary supplements don’t get the same results as those who consume real foods that have anti-inflammatory properties.

Moreover, in order to lower inflammation through diet, it is also important to stay away from foods that can promote inflammation, such as sugar, she said. [7 Foods You Can Overdose On]

“So it is not just about adding these things in, it is also about taking pro-inflammatory foods out,” Kirkpatrick said.

Dr. Monica Aggarwal, a cardiologist and a member of the Heart Center at Mercy Medical Center in Baltimore, agreed. “There is a lot of data that suggests that we are eating too many inflammatory foods,” such as meat, eggs, dairy and processed foods that are high in preservatives, she told Live Science.

Aggarwal recommended that people eat less of such foods and eat more of such foods as fruits and vegetables that are full of lycopene and other carotenoids, which can help decrease inflammation. (Tomatoes and guavas are rich in lycopene; peppers, carrots and spinach are good sources of carotenoids, according to data from the U.S. Department of Agriculture.)

So, if you start eating a diet full of foods with possible anti-inflammatory compounds, and low in those with pro-inflammatory effects, can you expect to see a general improvement in your inflammation levels?

“I think it depends on what you were eating before — if you were eating the DASH diet, possibly not, but if you were eating the typical American diet before, which is so low in fruit and vegetables, definitely,” said Julie Wylie-Rosett, a professor in the department of epidemiology and population health and the department of medicine at Albert Einstein College of Medicine of Yeshiva University in New York.

It is still not clear, however, how an actual anti-inflammatory diet compares with taking an anti-inflammatory medication regularly, she said.”I don’t think there has ever been a head-to-head comparison of an anti-inflammatory dietary pattern versus the use of drugs,” Wylie-Rosett told Live Science.

“Food is medicine, but it is hard to compare medicine that is created in a lab with something that is grown in the ground to determine what is going to be beneficial,” Kirkpatrick said. Depending on a person’s condition, and the reasons for their inflammation, medication may be necessary, while food can be still be a nice add-on.

Originally published on Live Science.


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4 Ways to Get Through Life’s Most Difficult Times

“Sometimes when things are falling apart, they may actually be falling into place.”

It’s pretty easy to be happy and content when things are going well in your life; but what about when circumstances change for the worse? How do you react to this type of change?

Dwight Moody once said, “Character is what you are in the dark.” These dark moments are a reflection of your inner strength, courage, and resilience. Most people go through at least one very difficult time in their life – grief over the loss of a loved one, poverty, job loss, homelessness, or some other tremendous hardship which tests every ounce of strength they can muster.

Here’s something to remember that is easy to forget: you are much stronger than you think. And you are stronger still for going through difficult times. You’ll go through an inner storm; you’ll suffer; you’ll beg for it all to end, and it eventually will. When it does end, you’ll come out stronger and better than before.

Here are 4 ways to get you through life’s most difficult times:

1. Remember that happiness comes from within

Our society is inundated with messages of consumerism and materialism. The constant barrage of messages from the advertisement and marketing industries has created the illusion that more stuff means more happiness. This is simply untrue.

Sure, a spending spree at the local mall can provide some pleasure…temporary pleasure. Spending is never a long-term solution for easing pain – in fact, it’s just the opposite. In developed countries, most households have debt amounts that exceed their disposable income. This overspending has had tremendous repercussions on individuals and families.

The truth is that happiness will always be found internally. Doing things that truly promote happiness – being grateful, learning, playing, curiosity, meditation, exercise, prayer, family time, etc. – will provide genuine happiness…even in very difficult times.

No matter what is happening externally, you can tap into this inner source of happiness. Yes, the external circumstances of your life have an effect, but it’s not to the degree that you may think. It’s still possible to tap into a multitude of things – both discovered and undiscovered – that will create true happiness. Find those things and focus on them.

fallingintoplace

2. Acknowledge your emotions

When pain – especially tremendous pain – presents itself, it is natural to want to run away and ignore it. Ask anyone who’s lost a child, parent, or someone near and dear to their heart. Quite understandably, the last thing they want to do is relive the hurt of that loss.

But the truth is that emotions need to be faced and experienced. Yes, you may worry because emotions can be overwhelming. As a result, many fear that they won’t be able to handle them. Just remember what was discussed in the introduction – you are stronger than you think.

Dr. Christina Hibbert, author of This is How We Grow, has experienced some tumultuous times – losing one sister at age 8, and another sister (and her husband) at a later age. As a result, she inherited an extended family; including two children as a result of the second sister’s death.

She’s certainly earned the right to give her advice, so here are her own words:

“(Ignoring your emotions) is like trying to run away from something that’s right on your shoulder. The only way to truly be free is to stop and face your emotions…people tend to get stuck because they’re not feeling their emotions…they are not letting themselves really feel the pain, loss, sadness, anger, that is lurking within.”

Hibbert developed her own grief coping method called TEARS – “Talking, Exercising, Artistic express, Recording or writing experiences, and Sobbing” she continues, “These five things can give us something to do when feeling overwhelmed by stress.”

3.  Remember to be grateful (even for the little things).

When dark moments happen in life, it’s easy to forget a lot of things, including gratitude. Emotions overtake our rational thought processes when we are overwhelmed with any type of stimuli, including pain.

The beautiful thing about gratitude is that you’ll never run out of it. Being grateful is all about perspective. Thinking about or meditating on the abundance in your life is a wonderful way to bring these things to the surface.

For example, if you are reading this right now, you have a computer (or smartphone) and internet access. Only about 40% of people in the world have access to the internet; with even fewer having access to a device such as a smartphone or computer. Did you have something for breakfast or lunch? About 1 billion people have gone without. Have you earned more than $1.25 today? About 1.2 billion people in the world have received less.

These statistics are not meant to create guilt, but to cause a change in perspective. There are destitute people all over the world that still manage to create happiness under far more difficult circumstances. Find something in your life to be grateful for and focus on it.

(As a side note): If able, please consider giving your time or money to those less fortunate. There are many great organizations focused on reducing and eradicating hunger, poverty, and disease in countries all over the world. These people need strong individuals to take a stand and help.

4. Practice being present

You’ll find that this is a consistent theme through much of the material on this site: the practice of being present. Living in the here and now is so important, and it helps you to deal with problems as they arise – without judgment, hesitance, or objection. Things are just as they should be, for better or for worse.

Regardless of the painful circumstances facing you, it is important to realize that this is where you are, wanted or unwanted. You can attempt to dodge, avoid, suppress or deny, but in the end, it just is what it is.

Being present goes beyond dealing with painful circumstances. Mindfulness and presence enable you to express full joy and gratefulness towards the blessings in life. Further, it allows you to perceive these blessings better when they do surface.

Resist the urge to judge what has happened in the past or what may happen in the future. All you have and all that you are guaranteed is the present moment. Take full advantage of the moment and appreciate the beauty of life that exists all around you.

Of course, being present sometimes involves pain, but it will be okay. Allow yourself to experience the moment, however painful it may be, knowing that it will pass…you will eventually flourish as a person – perhaps as a better version of yourself.

 


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6 Things You Must Release In Order to Move Forward

One aspect of being a productive, happy person is growth – both personal and professional. We strive to create new opportunities for a few different reasons: ambition, money, influence, career growth, new challenges, and etcetera. It’s natural to seek opportunities and circumstances that challenge us and force us to be our best.

While most of us know the things that we need to do in order to be successful – hard work, long hours, more responsibility – less attention is paid to the things that must stop doing in order to realize this success. You’ll notice that most of these self-damaging behaviors and habits are a result of your thinking, which is perhaps your important asset in achieving success, and one that can give you a tremendous advantage…or disadvantage.

Here are 6 things that you must release
to move forward achieve success

1. Release the desire to make everyone happy.

Everyone has an opinion about everyone they know, accurate or inaccurate. Unfortunately, many of us focus too much on what others think about us. This is only natural, as we want to be accepted, liked, and appreciated.

When you make a conscious effort to achieve success in your life, there are going to be people who don’t want you to get ahead for various reasons out of envy, bitterness, fear, or something else. Success can bring out these feelings because not everyone has the drive to better the circumstances in their life. It is important to remember that this is their problem, not yours. It is not your job to make these people happy, only to make yourself happy in what you choose to do with your own life.

2. Release excuses while being accountable for your actions.

There are truly intelligent and gifted people that will never achieve success in their life because they can’t or won’t stop making excuses and blaming others. When an opportunity presents itself, you must seize that opportunity to the fullest and remember that only you can make it happen. Blaming others for your problems and making excuses will never yield positive outcomes…ever.

If we’re honest with ourselves, we innately know that we’ve been guilty at this at one time or another. The problem with this is that we disempower ourselves from what can become ours if we take ownership of what needs to be done. Work hard, own up, and have the resolve to drive forward without making excuses or shifting blame onto other people.

3. Release big mistakes and failures of the past.

We’ve all made mistakes and failed at some point in our lives, some more often than others. It bears repeating: there is absolutely nothing that can be done about these past failures…what’s done is done. The belief that “You can judge a person’s future by their past” is a false one that can be accepted as truth if we are not careful.

Walt Disney is a tremendous American success story who created a multi-billion dollar entertainment empire. He also was a notorious failure and mistake-maker at one point, being fired by a news editor and bankrupting his first animation company.

Richard Branson, the billionaire communications mogul, lost hundreds of millions of dollars before creating one of the largest communication brands in the entire world.

Steven Spielberg was rejected twice by the University of Southern California and went to a much less-prestigious college… before becoming perhaps the most famous film directors in history.

Does anyone ever mention these people’s mistakes and failures? No. It’s what you choose to make out of your life despite failing that defines you.

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4. Release past pain and trauma.

Sometimes the word “difficulty” does not truly do justice to things we’ve experienced in the past. Some of us have experienced significant pain and even trauma from things that have happened to us.

The inherent problem in reliving pain and trauma is that it can derail the efforts to better your life. You’ll never fully embrace the present or future possibilities without relieving yourself of these psychologically-damaging thoughts. While you may never forget what has happened, you can still lead a successful, abundant life despite of having gone through tremendous difficulty.

Kevin Spacey, the outstanding Emmy and Oscar award-winning actor epitomizes success while facing past pain and trauma. His father was a full-time Nazi party member and pornographer who reportedly sexually abused his own children. Understandably, Spacey experienced severe mental and emotional damage by this. He was so distraught by his father’s actions that he took his mother’s maiden name as his own, forever cutting off any ties to his father.

While certainly an extreme example, it shows that resolve in the face of pain or trauma can overcome anything.

5. Release insecurity.

As with most other deeply rooted beliefs, insecurity can be tough to overcome, but it can be overcome. That being said, don’t worry about what others think of you. Again, this is their problem, not yours. Anyways, most people are far too encumbered with their own lives to really think about you much.

If you believe that you’re a strong, capable person of immense value, nothing that anyone else thinks can change that…unless you let them. Insecurity is a state of mind, but so is boldness and confidence. Hold your head high, believe in yourself, and others are more likely to hold you in high regard.

6. Release jealousy and resentment.

Who, at one point or another, has held feelings of jealousy or resentment? (Raises hand). Yes, jealousy and resentment are common human emotions, but ones that are disempowering and energy-sapping.

Further, jealousy and resentment are irrational, unproductive thoughts that do absolutely nothing positive for us. This is especially true when attempting to achieve any type of goal of measure of success. Resenting someone else because of their success or accomplishment is weak thinking and counterproductive. Instead, try to appreciate that they achieved success through hard work, determination and sacrifice, which they most likely did.

We can all learn from people that have been successful instead of harboring negative feelings. Try to build a relationship with and build your social circle around such people. Success breeds success, and you’ll likely find a good person that will provide some motivation and encouragement for you to achieve your goals.